Apartment Blues

I HATE apartment shopping. It stresses me out beyond belief. I especially hate apartment shopping in Utah. With BYU's two mile rule it drives prices up. You go outside the two miles around BYU and it gets even more complicated. Suddenly nothing is furnished and I think to myself "Wait, when between graduating college and getting a job was I supposed to suddenly have furniture?" I did find one apartment I fell in love with but housing apparently is so competitive, I have to fill out an application and hope to get picked! How do you make yourself stand out on a housing application? Do I write a cover letter? "My objective in applying for this apartment is to acquire a place to sleep at night and maybe cook some meals." So here I am, stressing about how much I am going to spend on rent, how suddenly insignificant my belongings have become, and wondering why washers and dryers don't grow on trees.
Now I am understanding other peoples attractions to "alternative lifestyles". Examples:
Carnival workers a.k.a. Carnies: Living out of the back of a U-haul and seeing the country one dinky town at a time is sounding pretty good right now. "My house ain't got heated floors but if you drive fast enough with the back hatch open you get a nice breeze coming through!" (not a quote from a movie, just a scene that played out in my head.
Hippies: Yeah, eating dried fruit, stringing beads on willow branches and selling them out of the back of a van sounds like a pretty sweet set up right now. Organic cactus juice anyone?
Strippers: Yes, strippers. I love to dance. I love high heels. Might as well make some money while I'm at it. Wouldn't it be nice to have money being stuffed into you instead of coming out your nose? I'm afraid I'd have to give up eating to get a job at any of these joints so I'll give up on this dream.
Well, the saga continues and life gets stickier. But don't be surprised if you receive a house warming party invitation in a month and I have forgotten all about my apartment blues.